And that's my feelings towards life. I'm sick and tired of it. I don't know what I'm here for, I don't know what I want to do with my life. There's just no motivation for me to move forward, no drive to push me through the whole process. I'm just going with the flow, living everyday as it is. And trust me, I am not enjoying it at all. The idea of life, is just so wrong, yet we are living in it. I can only blame humanity.

When we were young, we study. Now that we are older, we work. Have we ever questioned ourselves the purpose of studying and working? To gain knowledge to better prospects in the job industry so that we earn enough to retire happily and are able to do whatever we want to do? If that was your answer, then I guess it's a little too late. Seriously, bungee jumping at 65?!

And because of studying and working, if you did not realize, we are all living in a box. We sleep in box (bed), work in a box (cubicle), eat from a box (lunchbox), travel home in a box (bus/trains/cars), watch the box (television), sleep in the box again. And this cycle repeats itself every single day till we finally think out of the box. And trust me, many of us are trapped in this box for the rest of our lives.

Life is unfair. Stereotypes, generalization, discrimination. And it just disgusts me even more. Everyone are on equal footing, no one being is greater than another. Our existence in this world all came from the same entrance. And it didn't come with a choice.

Who allowed for discrimination? Looking down on others because of their race, religion, gender. Grouping every down syndrome as stupid. Branding every criminal as evil. We are not perfect ourselves that we are given the power to secern others. Not to mention that deep down, everyone has a good heart and is a nice person. And judging based on race and religion is just unacceptable.

The words in red is indeed true and reflective of most societies right? In the past, they set the trend that life must be as such. And most people blindly follow. They set the trend that one should live a life full of material wealth. But when you die, where do all your material wealth go to? They set the trend that this group of people are in a higher class than the rest. But do they have a choice? They were born in a certain way and in a certain manner. But that doesn't give one the opportunity to tease them and step on them.

I want to be able to live a life of freedom. To be able to do the things I want to do freely and not rule out any possibilities because of the constraints of the human mind to think in a certain way. I am sick and tired of living a life that people want me to live in, saying that it's all for a good future. I am sick and tired of not being able to do stuff that I want to do because of what society instills into many. I want to mould my own future.

I have too many regrets, listening to opinions of others and not thinking for myself. Making choices that is screwing my life upside down now. I keep asking myself, "What if I had chose a different path then?" .. And more "What if"s. It's all in the stereotyping of man.

Funny how each time I choose something that I want to do, I get criticism all over, and in the end follow what others want me to do. And if I screwed up, I get blamed for not doing it well. Of course, I won't do well in something that I don't want to do in the first place.

I want to have the freedom of choice. I want to have the freedom to do whatever I want to do. I want to have my choices opened. I want to do stuff that I believe it. I don't want to be forced to listen to others and follow whatever they do. I don't want to have to change myself to suit another being. I don't want to judge people the way that many others do. I don't want to drown in regrets.

And my life now is just the total opposite of the above few paragraphs mentioned. I just wished someone would understand how I feel, and where I am coming from. I am just so sick and tired of it all. And numb would be the word, because I don't have a choice.