Out of my busy schedule, I have taken some time off to blog about this which I think is pretty important.
Let's talk about leadership. I was bickering with Shazrina during Civics Tutorial quite a few weeks back, on Hitler. I mentioned that Hitler was a great leader, but a very bad influence to his people. Shazrina argued with me that Hitler was not a great leader, because he used underhand and cruel means to get his people to support him. That is a sign of good leadership, when you can get your people all behind you. But he used the wrong method to guide his people, which makes it bad. Nevertheless, you still have to praise him
So you may ask what makes a good leader? Or in other words, what are the qualities a leader should have?
I've a mentor,
Dr Ernest Wong, whom I have worked with since I was in Secondary 1 till now. Yes, it's Super-Teens Holiday Camp. Over the many years that I've worked with him, I have learned many new things. One of which is the qualities of being a leader.
He told me,
"To be a leader, one must fulfil these qualities."
1. A leader must have direction.
2. A leader must have expertise in a certain area.
3. A leader must have good relationships with his followers.
4. A leader must learn to use his position power.
The above are what I think is pretty true, to be able to call oneself a leader.
A leader must have the direction, he must have an end in mind, to know where he wants to bring his followers to, to achieve all their goals. A leader must have expertise in a certain area, he must be better in something than the rest that makes him different, that allows him to be able to teach another person what he is good in. A leader must have good relationships with his followers, he must understand and communicate each and every of his followers, he must be able to bond with all his people. He must be able to speak up for his people, and not put them down. And lastly, a leader must learn to make use of his position power, and not abuse it, he must be the one who leads. He must be able to put himself at the same level as his people, so as to understand what they are going through, and not the leader all the time.
Well, perhaps the explanation is not thorough enough. I shall give you an example. I wanted to use Tasya, my Project Work group leader, as an example here, but I guess not. I shall talk about my canoeing teacher, not to suck up to him or whatsoever.
My canoeing teacher, I would say, is a pretty good leader. Although he is not really considered a leader in this case, but still, he fulfils all the qualities mentioned above.
My canoeing teacher has the direction, an end in mind, a goal which he wants all of us to be able to meet. And because of this, he is slowly bringing us to that point, motivating us and encouraging us all the way. He has the expertise in canoeing. He paddles well, and is able to correct our strokes and mistakes in the water. Though he may be sarcastic at times, I would say that he has pretty good relationships with many of us. He makes it a point to understand what we are going through, and bothers to talk to us on a personal basis, instead of as a group. He uses his authority well, he knows when to scold us, and when to back off. There's just quite a number of good qualities that lies in him.
If you are one who is arrogant, thinks highly of yourself, is full of yourself, talks bad about your followers behind that backs and do not know what your people are going through . What makes you think that you've what it takes to be called a leader? I despise these people the most.
I dislike it when people do not know about me, and make judgements about me. Out of which is definitely negative things. When I was young, Mum told me not to allow others to read me like a book. She told me that "Jess, it's a dogs' world out there. Once people know your weakness, they'll attack you from there." That statement made sense to me, so, I am pretty guarded towards the way I act in front of different groups of people.
To friends whom I am very close with, pretty much the majority of them, they would know me like ... at their fingertips. Ask them a question about me, they can answer you directly. The other group of friends, is where I am not very close to them, but still able to hold conservations and laughters here and there. But, they do not know me very well. And the last group of them, is where I find it really tough to come up with a topic of conversation, where our character are like two worlds apart. These people, know nuts about me, and some, tries too hard.
Perhaps you can say that, I am brought up in a pretty much restrictive environment whereby I am not able to express myself as freely as I want to. That's why I go crazy in school/outside of home. I can say that my parents are pretty strict with me, even till now, after tasting the cane and belt and hanger and the palm. And also, over protective of me, because they love me and want the best for me. And I do not want to go against them, which I may have already done so by choosing the water, because I do not know when I will lose them, for I want to be the best daughter in their eyes.
If you think that I am using my parents as 'ridiculous reasons' for training, think again. Do you know what I am going through in life? NO. Do you know what its like in front of my parents? NO. Do you understand me? NO. Worse of all, do you make it a point to know your people well? NO. The answers are all - NO NO AND NO. So what rights have you got to talk bad about me?
WHY SO BITCHYYYY! GAY GAY GAY!All you ever think about is yourself, and part of the enthusiastic ones in the team. What about the rest? There are many others, who may not be as good as the rest, but trying their best. Do you recognise their efforts? NO. Let me put it this way, in rhetorical question. How well have you played your role of position power? Ask yourself this question. How well do you know your people (All of them)? Perhaps for a some, how many people dislike you because of your actions? I believe I can easily pick out 20 people (To one of you).
I am not saying that I am the best. I know its wrong of me to skip trainings, and am selfish because I never thought of the others. I apologise. But think from my side of the story. Place yourself in my shoes. I know you want the best for the team, you want us to be the best. I totally understand that. I am not blaming you for the ignorance and scoldings you give during trainings, I know from your side of the story. Just like today, Lydia Cheung and I were scolded for taking too many rests at the pontoon, because we capsized and had to empty water. It is alright for me because I know that the both of us are lagging behind, and if not, we should be quite okay in it already. And that we should be serious during trainings. Please, learn to be less biased, look at both sides of the coin dude. What the hell is wrong with you?! At least make it a point to not talk bad behind my back.
There's just something which I wanna tell you -
Be less of a GU NIANG!If you think that I am staying in the team for the Team Bag and the Shirt, I shall disappoint you by saying that your assumption is wrong. The reason why I am in canoeing, is because I love the water, and so, I am staying as it is. I can not have the bag, I can not have the shirt, it's fine with me. And talking about choices, I had the choice of quitting long ago. But did I? NO. Stop being so biased.
I have gone through more shit than you did. Always living under the shelter and protection of your parents, you will never know what is pain, until you have experienced it. By all means, live my life. I bet you'll handle the circumstances that I have been through worst off than me. I can read you like a book, and you can't read me. And if you do not know me well, do not know what I am going through in life, do not judge me. I repeat, DO NOT JUDGE ME.
Take this with an open mind, a pinch of salt.
;D
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UPDATE:
COOOL! SO IT GOT DELETED EHHH!
That just double confirms what kind of a person you are.
;DDD
